House Beautiful

Malibu Weekend

I LOVE MALIBU | COVET LIVING

I spent my Galentine’s Day weekend in my favorite place on earth: MALIBU.  I’m insanely lucky to have one of my dearest gal pals there with a place on the beach, which = a getaway whenever I need it.  I remember thinking before I had ever ventured to this magical, beachy, laid-back fairy wonderland that it would be pretentious and snooty (*cough* like a lot of LA), but to me it feels just the opposite. EVERYONE is cheerful and friendly; even chatty.  No one ever seems to be in a hurry. Pups splash around in the surf with no leashes in sight.  Sunlight dances on the water like diamonds.  EVERYTHING is beautiful.  Everyone’s feet are sandy.  The waves are louder than anywhere else I’ve ever been and lull you into a dazed state of relaxation during the day, then rock you to sleep at night.  Surfers are in silhouette at dawn and dusk.  It is heaven.  Here’s my weekend, in pics:

Gus, being a great house guest, waking up Aunt Katie.

Gus and Kate | Covet Living

High-larious #truth on Valentine’s Day morning.

Fat Jewish | Covet Living

Let’s go, woman!

Beach House | Malibu

Even Gus is in a zen place.

Gus | Covet Living

Sea glass hunting

Sea Glass | Covet Living

Trying to get a good pic with this monster before I went to meet another friend for lunch at Duke’s.

Gus and Me | Covet Living

Gus and Me 2 | Covet Living

It’s just not ugly here.

Private Beach, Malibu | Covet Living

He doesn’t think so either.  Slash that’s some amazing bed head.

Gus in Malibu | Covet Living

What my Saturday looked like… outside of lunch, a 6-mile beach walk, and my first time stand-up Paddle boarding – which scared the ever-living &#%$ out of me. Getting off shore past the monster crashing waves with that giant board was a real treat… I got beat the truck up and thrown down about 7 times, knocked in the head with the board, lost my suit a time or two, and scraped my whole self up – while Val Kilmer stood on his balcony and watched.  He’s DEFINITELY seen my boobs.  Finally, I got out there.  It was both peaceful and terrifying – being a hundred yards or so off the shore, not knowing what’s underneath you, and having a baby seal (aka shark snack) bobbing right next to your board… but hey.  I lived.

Malibu | Covet Living

A handfulla sea glass from our long walk, and a wee heart-shaped rock for good measure.

Sea Glass and Gus | Covet Living

The surf

Surf | Covet Living

Big pimpin in my big Golden Girls sunhat

Malibu Weekend | Covet Living

Kate and I did The Ranch at Solstice Canyon on Saturday night for dinner… we chanced it without rezzies, and just when I was ready to hover over some old people at the bar to pounce on their seats, Kate charmed the waiter into giving us the best seats in the house.  Flirting gets that girl the VIP treatment like no one I’ve ever seen.

Solstice Canyon | Covet Living

Solstice Canyon, Malibu | Covet Living

Posting up for sunset on Sunday.  I know, it’s Cat Lady status to the max with all the Gus pics, but he’s such a good soul and fulla personality I can’t help myself… plus lately, I’m keenly aware of his age and that my (years) with him are numbered. Anyhow – we parked it outside with a glass of vino to watch the sun go down.

Malibu | Covet Living

Going…

Malibu | Covet Living

Going…

Malibu | Covet Living

Gone.

Malibu | Covet Living

And then it just got prettier & prettier from there.

Malibu | Covet Living

Malibu | Covet Living
Malibu | Covet Living

And then KP came out to join us!  She was inside working.  Poor kid.

Malibu | Covet Living

It wasn’t a conventional Valentine’s Day, but hey.  What are you gonna do?  It was awesome.  And if you would’ve told me a little over a year ago a) that I would ever be single again, or b) that I would’ve quit my job, packed up my house, thrown Gus in the car and moved to other side of the country, I wouldn’t even have been able to get my brain around it.  Who knows why sh*t happens.  I’ve been busting out 90’s country at work for the past few weeks, and a few days ago an old Trace Adkins song called “Time Marches On” came on – the one that says: “The only thing that stays the same is everything changes, everything changes.”  And it almost took my breath away…  in part because I hadn’t heard that jam since high school, and when I did hear it again, it felt like I’d heard it yesterday… except it wasn’t yesterday; it had been 16 years.  Just like that.  (Do you feel a tangent coming on?  Cuz I do.  Get ready.)

I’m extraordinarily aware lately that time moves SO, so quickly, and I’m even more aware that nothing is guaranteed… things I never thought would happen have happened: I still can’t believe that our best friend Mel’s little brother Ryan is really gone.  Or that friends with perfect lives and seemingly perfect relationships would walk in to find their significant others cheating and their lives changed forever.  I also keep thinking about a wedding M & I were gleefully seated at a few years ago, when we still had what we thought was a whole life together ahead of us… Fast forward 3 years, and no one ever could’ve conceived that one day, he would vanish in the most senseless of ways… or that the groom at that wedding would die tragically less than a year later.  Or that tragedy would befall any of the people around us.  My point isn’t to be a downer; it’s to put extra emphasis on: “HOLY SH*T, LIFE IS PRECIOUS.” And you never really know what’s around the next corner.  Another old friend told me about a year ago that life was always going to ebb and flow with joy and sorrow, and that the only thing you can really do to manage it all is to always be at peace, because all of it is going to come down the pike no matter what.  It’s maybe some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten, and I thought a lot about that this weekend… about being at peace, and about how change is the only constant in life, and about how things move so quickly that it’s all too short to spend doing anything but being fully present, wherever you are.  Even in the wake of things that tug (hard) at your heart. That’s what I’m working on doing a lot more these days… and this weekend was a good start.  Cuz if I had spent the weekend worrying about the life I thought I was going to have, then I wouldn’t have been able to appreciate the life that I actually do… and all of the wonderful things that are here now: like having an amazing friend in Kate… or a deliriously happy dog – who one day won’t be here anymore – and who traipses up and down the beach to greet (everyone) like it’s the best day of his life… And maybe I wouldn’t have been able to appreciate all the beauty that was around me, or how Kate & I both almost peed our pants when we got into the backseat of an old woman’s car parked outside her door on Saturday night who we THOUGHT was the Uber driver, but who then said to us: “What are you girls doing in my car?  Who are you?  What the hell is Uber?”  Etc etc.  Anyway – try not to blink, yo, or you’ll miss so much of the good stuff.  Imma tryda do the same.

Never Let the Things You Don't Have | Covet Living

Fist bump long distance,

Steph's Scanned Signature

aka Jack Handy

Bachelor Week 7: Whitney for President

Kids, my apologies in advance… somehow, last night’s episode got deleted from my DVR (*COUGH* – KYLE), so I have no dice on the hilarious screen grabs that usually accompany these posts.  We’ll have to kick it old school / in black & white this week… though I did steal a few from ABC and from my sister-floozies who also blog about the Bach…

1.  I ADORE Whitney.  She is a class act, and I love how obvious it is that he’s in love with the person she is on the inside.  Remember when she told him her tragic story, but in an “FYI, this is what happened and I’m just preparing you for next week and don’t feel sorry for me because I’m still so blessed and it made me the person I am” way?  GYAH.  She’s got this season in the BAG.  The end.  #whitneyforpresident

Whitney Bischoff

2.  I do love her, and she’s not sporting as much cakeup as say – my homegirl Tarantulashes – but I’m still kind of itching to see her au naturel / without a Tammy Faye Baker tease or bouffant in the front.  I’m pretty sure she’s just as gorge without makeup.  Also… is she unofficially sponsoring Lululemon?

3.  Britt is DEFINITELY stunning and definitely looks like a cross between Angelina Jolie + Vanessa Williams…  but have you also noticed that she kind of has the face of a cute little 4-year boy?  Or, a chipmunk.

Britt

4.  I effing LOVE CHRIS for giving her the boot… when she kept trying to interrupt him in that epic 4th grade battle of who-can-break-up-with-whom-first and he just said, “that’s not how I want my wife to act,” my living room ERUPTED.  See ya sistah.  Also…  the wailing / crying tantrum outside, like someone had just taken away her Tonka Twucks??  Fer f*#&’s sake, get it together.

Britt via ABC

5.  Jade’s dad was so sweet.  I’m also pretty sure he had to have knocked up Jade’s mom when they were 14, because he might be 13.2 years older than his daughter.

6.  Jade’s brother = what Jade looked like during her awkward stage.

7.  I love that after she delighted in showing him her lady bits on the internet, she wore a full length, long sleeve dress to the rose ceremony.  GURL – the jig is up.  We’ve all seen your labia flapping in the wind.  That’s a doodle that can’t be undid… thanks, Jason Biggs.

Jade showing Chris Playboy, via ABC

8.  Becca is so sweet… but God bless her, so young.  I almost called her one dimensional, but that’s not entirely fair.  I think she’s just young.  I also thought her hometown date was like that scene from the Thomas Crown Affair when there are 100 dudes walking around in the same outfit with the same hat, à la Magritte’s Son of Man painting… or when you go to pick out a puppy from a litter and all 12 of them look the same… all the chicks had the same hairdo!  I couldn’t even pick her out of a lineup.

Becca

9.  Also, I’d drop kick my sister if she’d lobbed me under the bus like that.

Becca's Sis

10.  Kaitlyn’s Mom might ACTUALLY have been the love guru from the Yoga porn episode… or, Janet from Three’s Company.  Her fam and that whole kumbahya scene was sweet.  She’s hysterical and I’ll be sad to see her go.

11.  Speaking of family, I thought what Whitney’s sister said to Chris (“Call me when you’re actually ready to propose and we’ll talk then“) was totally fair.

12.  Raise your hand if – when Chris was about to have to go spew his swimmers into that cup – everyone wasn’t wondering if he was gonna flip a Playboy open and see Jade.

13.  I was also sad to see Carly go, even though she was totally in the friend zone with Chris… her calling Britt out was so on point, every time.  Also.  I’m pretty sure I almost saw her little Jade in that blue mini-dress with the lapels.

Carly

14.  I almost started crying when Chris started crying.  Bless his heart, I love him.

Chris Soules Crying

15.  Also – did you guys see this tweet by Sean Lowe??  (…that’s Whitney’s apartment) – effing hilarious.

Sean Lowe Tweet

I’m off my game without the DVR!  What did I forget??

xoxo & Happy Tuesday, floozies!

Steph's Scanned Signature