House Beautiful

Golden Globes Recap 2019

Where to even begin?? How about right here… because my reaction looked JUST LIKE GLENN CLOSE’S FACE first looked when I was trying to register the news that Gaga didn’t win Best Actress. Utter disbelief. I thought we were having another Warren Beatty / La La Land / Moonlight moment. I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE IT.

I love Glenn and I do still need to see The Wife… and I thought it was very telling that on her way to the podium she only stopped to hug Lady Gaga – who you could tell even she thought was a lock for the award (she even told Natalie Morales that she didn’t prepare a speech b/c she knew Gaga was going to win). And Gaga’s gracious reaction and telling Glenn to “go get it!” made me love her even more.

And then… DAYUM. I give Glenn Close the Golden Globe for best acceptance speech. So moving and so spot-on that I’m posting the entire thing:

That said… after last night I’m curious if the Hollywood Foreign Press actually watched A Star Is Born. I also just saw this online which is hilarious and what I was thinking verbatim. Couldn’t have said it better sister!

Best Actress was for sure the biggest upset… and I knew the Best Actor race was gonna be a close overtime thriller b/w Bradley & Rami, though I still thought Bradley would edge it out. Rami Malek really was amazing though – his performance made that movie.

But the Roma guy beating out B-Coop in the Best Director category was when I started to snort and throw things and yell, because WHAT IS THIS CONSPIRACY. Then, when Bohemian Rhapsody won Best Picture – I just sat with my arms crossed and shook my head, like a 4-year old. Bohemian Rhapsody was really entertaining and I did like it (Karrie did not – she thought it was full of fluff, and I don’t totally disagree on the fluffy bit) – but like it as I may – it is just not even in the same stratosphere as A Star Is Born. I didn’t even want to see A.S.I.B. – I’ve never been a huge Gaga fan, and I didn’t take Bradley Cooper all that seriously – but I walked out of that theater with such mad respect for both of them. That movie jarred and gutted me, then stayed with me for weeks – and I think that’s just about everyone’s reaction who’s seen it. Nothing I’ve seen this year has even come close to how powerful that movie was. Even Chris said last night: “I can’t believe the only movie that’s ever made me feel (like that) came up empty.” I’m saying double or nothin’ at the Oscars. Bradley & Gaga are due some major props. I may personally picket outside the Academy’s window from now until the then.

Phew, moving on… I love to see all the boys embracing velvet.

Knockout! I love a lady in pink sequins – one of my favorites. Her skin also looked INSANE.

Carol Burnett was so, so good. I cried. Love her and used to watch her with my grandparents when I was little. What a class act.

Hands-down Best Dressed.

Hands-down her best accessory. That is one dapper man. And they are royalty.

Speaking of dapper… Rami Malek might be my Best Dressed Man. We all know from the 4-page monologue above that I was bummed to not see Bradley take Best Actor, but Rami really was amazing as Freddie Mercury. Lucy’s skin’s lookin real dewy and lovely too.

PS, OMG I would like to congratulate Bradley Cooper on his engagement to a tween model WHO BY THE WAY IS SO STUNNING SHE NEEDN’T EVEN WEAR ONE OUNCE OF JEWELRY and only a hint of makeup. Just kidding, she’s 33 but DAMN GIRL. Gorgeous as she is, he still might be prettier.

Did anyone notice that Jamie Lee Curtis & Richard Gere had THE EXACT SAME HAIR??? My girl Kendra who I was watching the show with pointed that out, and I’m not sure anyone has ever been so right about anything, ever.

Keri Russell was a VISION. She’s another Best Dressed for me. And her not taking home Best Actress in a TV Drama for the last season of the Americans – arguably her best ever on the series – was a shame, I thought. Felicity or bust.

BUT – at least the show won for best TV Drama – that was so well-deserved.

Jeff Bridges was great. I especially enjoyed the part when he went totally rogue and Chris Pine was chuckling in the background.

So chic. One of her best ever.

While we’re on that peacock-y jewel-toned note… I thought Gemma Chan looked INSANELY BEAUTIFUL.

And while we’re talking about peekaboo pants… I audibly gasped at Julia. She is JUST lovely. All of it. I’m glad to see her aging gracefully and that her face (up close) doesn’t have that glassy botox’d look – I don’t know that she’s ever looked better. Fun fact: we see the same esthetician in LA.


I love Timothée Chalamet. I loved Beautiful Boy, even though it was heart-wrenching to watch. I also can’t wait to watch him do his trapeze artist routine at the after party. #barnumandbaileys

Speaking of Beautiful Boy, I thought Steve Carell was so so good in the role as David Sheff, and even though I know these things are a tight squeeze, I thought he could’ve been in the running with a nomination.

Did anyone else notice that Miss Golden Globe (Isan Elba) was legit falling asleep on stage towards the end of the night?! I wish I had a pic of it. Somebody needs to spike that girl’s Shirley Temple with some Monster next time.

One of my favorite speeches. She is a hoot. And I didn’t realize until she thanked Melissa McCarthy for the sandwiches THAT THEY DON’T FEED THE CELEBS ANYTHING BUT BOOZE at the Globes.

All that booze and no grub is a recipe for someone like Christian Bale to say he drew inspiration from Satan to play Dick Cheney in Vice, which made me snort and cackle. That was probably one of the only non-PC things anyone said last night.

I love her, and she is intergalactic and svelte, but this def reminds me of the inside of the armadillo cake from Steel Magnolias.

I think she could’ve lost the cape, but my take away was the color combo of what’s happening underneath – the bright emerald + peach + chartreuse + lilac is something I would want to paint an abstract piece with.

The bejeweled bikini meets ballerina look was fun for her.

Kaley C was totally channeling Jennifer Aniston – did you guys notice that?  So cute and classic and comfortable in her skin and natural.  Her hair wasn’t anything fancy but I didn’t mind it.

I wish I could find a better shot, but her earrings might’ve been the most BOMB part of this whole thing.


I think it was Brad Goreski who said before the show that he *hoped* she would do something edgy and not dress like her character, and I couldn’t have agreed more. She did still look lovely and that color is beautiful, but I thought she looked very much like Mrs. Maisel.

OMG THE BOW!  The BOW!  One of my favorites of the night. In other news – and this is nothing new – she has the CUTEST ACCENT EVER. I also now really want to see the Gianni Versace movie.

Charlize Theron looks beautiful and put-together and also like the most statuesque perfume bottle I’ve ever seen.

This is 52. The only thing I would’ve left behind is the Rapunzel ponytail extension, which Kristin Cavallari wore as well and which I completely do not get.

I actually really liked this. You know I can’t say no to ruffles & doilies.

Also always love a deep V and LOVE me some velvet, but I could’ve used about 1/2″ more of fabric on either side, for areola’s sake.

I love Julianne Moore. So much. I think she is a supreme talent and a beauty no matter what she does. And as a fellow coffee & red wine drinker, I can say that I’d be more than happy to split a box of Crest Whitestrips with her. Spesh if either of us is going to wear white that bright. That actually hurt me to type out loud, but it does boggle my mind.

I loved this!  And I also thought Constance Wu was naked at first glance. PS WHERE WAS HENRY GOLDING? AKA the most handsome man on the planet.

Crouching lizard hidden pleather. She’s a boss but I didn’t get this at all.

Another lady I have mad respect for is Claire Foy, and this dress was so beautiful but I can’t figure out why someone didn’t tailor the bust of it.

For a second I thought Amber Heard was actually Sharon Stone, hot-mess-drunk at an awards show in the 90’s. She’s a beautiful girl but this was a miss for me.

I loved it. It totally reminded me of a bridesmaid’s dress the exact same color that I wore in 2000 in my friend Erica’s wedding, but I thought it was rad.

Emma Stone is a champ and is HILARIOUS in The Favourite, but I couldn’t figure out why she came dressed as Julie Andrews. It’s just a bit too octogenarian for her.

Thandie Newton’s hair = my spirit animal. Her smoky eye is gorge. Stunnah.

Love Sandra and Andy individually, but eh. The jokes fell a little flat for me. It made me miss people like Ellen and Tina Fey + Amy Poehler hosting.

Last but not least… I can sit over here and make observations about some of the most talented & beautiful people on the planet, because this is what I look like when I wake up in the morning. With Chewbacca’s hair and the face of a drunk toddler.

All I got, Campers! What did you think?







5 Responses to “Golden Globes Recap 2019”

  • Your parting selfie with Nick Nolte mugshot hair do made me tinkle.

  • I don’t understand the ladies having to show their “girls”. Every girl ever born has them so they aren’t showing us anything new. Most of them don’t have on bras so they are all flat!! The girls are suppose to stand up and salute!! lol


      • Best dressed for me was Regina in that pink gown. She looked fierce in it! I liked Lady Gaga’s dress too, but do we have to dye our hair to match our dress!? Also liked the bright yellow gown, but not familiar with the actress. Emily Blunt’s dress very pretty, but would have lived to seen it in a different color. Thanks for the recap, they are always fun and informative! Love your selfie! Love you

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